@ Mom's Tonight

I'm at mom's place tonight, as I start my group therapy tomorrow. I'm not feeling good tonight... feel a panic attack coming on. I haven't felt like this for a while, and I'm not too sure why it appeared out of the blue. I am nervous about tomorrow, but excited at the same time. I think what's bothering me mostly is waiting for my test results from the doctor. September 27th can't come soon enough... but at the same time I almost don't want the results because I'm terrified.

I got to talk about it today to my psychiatrist, and told her how I've been feeling. She's raising my Cymbalta from 60mg to 90mg, so it will be a rough next few days. The good thing is that I'll be seeing her in the group therapy, so I can discuss with everyone how I'm feeling.

I heard from the insurance company today, and my case manager is coming to visit me at home next week. Dammit... that means I have to clean! Just kidding with the cleaning part... my place isn't bad. It is so nice that she's coming to meet me at home, especially since she knows that my anxiety isn't completely better yet. She sounded very sweet on the phone, and I'm looking forward to talking to her about everything that I'm going through. Thank God I'm finally in group therapy... it took too long to get a placement in a group.

My grandmother is calling me to watch Bachelor Pad... oh God! I tried watching the first episode and had to change the channel. I will go make her happy and watch it with her.