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Friday 23 July 2010

It's My Life, It's Now or Never

So Wednesday night I was finally able to let loose and bust a move... ummm ya right! I did however, get to see Bon Jovi in concert! This was the first time in a long time, that I was able to go out in public and enjoy myself. First Kid Rock came out on stage... damn did he look hot! I've never thought of him as sexy before... but damn he looked hot on stage with no shirt!

Bon Jovi came on the stage around 9pm and played over two hours of his greatest hits. I sang along to most of it... it was quite therapeutic and a great stress reliever. Both my cousin and I couldn't help ourselves... we took over 100 photos and a dozen videos.

I had taken a lorazepam before we left. I was great for the whole concert... didn't feel anxious one bit. I was able to laugh, dance and giggle... I actually felt like my old self for a short while. I got tired every so often and had to sit to relax my feet and legs... reminds me that I've put on weight, and how hard regular every day stuff has become. I was good up until it was time to head home. As soon as we started walking through the Skywalk (a tunnel that connects the CN Tower & Rogers Center to the subway station), I felt like I was going to pass out. Within one minute of being in there, I was having a full panic attack... could feel the walls slowly closing in on me. I hid it very well... didn't want to alarm my cousin and make her feel bad. I kept my mouth shut, and tried to focus on my breathing. I glanced at the time... and it felt like an eternity that we were in there. Finally we reached the subway and I could breath again.

Since Wednesday, I still feel like I'm losing my voice a bit... it was worth it though!

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